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Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Stickin' it to the Man (sort of not really)
I got out of a jaywalking ticket this morning. I was crossing the street to go get coffee with my friend whose name sounds like Adeetjah, but is most definitely spelled differently (can you tell we're tight?). We didn't go to the crosswalk, because why go all the way up to the crosswalk when the coffee place is right across the street?! This has been my philosophy for the past 3 years, anyway.

So we're stranded in the center lane, waiting for traffic to subside, when a motorcycle cop sees us and pulls over. Adeetja pretends to get a phone call so as to look distracted. I just used the more old fashioned technique of avoiding eye contact, though I knew full well there was no chance in hell this would actually work.

When we finally crossed, the cop beckoned us over. He asked us for our IDs. At this point I'd resigned myself to the ticket, figuring I've jaywalked every day for three years. This is fair. I'll take it like a man. Then, as the cop gets the ticket out, Adeetjah starts spouting apologies. "We've learned our lesson", etc. After about a minute of groveling, the cop looked at me. "So he's the schmoozer and you're the silent one, is that it?". That's when I flew into a monologue about how broke I am. The cop actually felt sorry for me. He started giving financial advice. "Hey man, you're young. You should at least keep a small entertainment fund".

And then he let us go. And that's when I revised my attitude about jaywalking tickets. From now on, I'll take it like a man, but only if groveling fails.

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